The NYC subway system is pretty awesome when you think about it. It operates in 5 boroughs 24-hours-per-day, covering over 842 miles of track and servicing nearly 1.64 billion riders annually. By annual ridership, the New York City Subway is the seventh busiest rapid transit rail system in the world.
As great as the NYC subway system is, I hate the people that ride it. Specifically there are 3 types of people I absolutely despise: The Wall-Street Prick, the Show-off Dude who’s reading a novel, and the hybrid Wall-Street Prick who’s reading a novel.
The Wall-Street Prick is quite possibly the biggest asshole on the NYC subway system. This guy is more of an asshole than Kevin Garnett and Paul Pierce combined. With his hair slicked back, perfectly tailored suit, and irritating smirk, the Wall-Street Prick gets on just about everyone’s nerves –except the gold-digger that’s with him. Excuse me, excuse me, she found true love. I feel like every time I get on the subway next to one of these guys they are always checking me out head to toe. Yes Wall-Street Prick, my shoes aren’t as expensive as yours. No Wall-Street Prick, I don’t give a shit that you work on Wall-Street. Yes Wall-Street Prick, I know you have an addiction to strippers and adderal. Why are they always looking at people like they can crush them with their wallet? The only person that’s getting crushed on this train is you Wall-Street Prick, by my 30-lb Dell Inspiron Labtop if you keep looking at me funny.
The Show-off Dude who’s reading a novel places 2nd to the WSP, a close 2nd. Reading Stephen King or Ernest Hemingway doesn’t make you elite so stop holding your book up in a position so people can see. I’ll hold my Maxim magazine and Hobbit book right back at you. Common, like you’re actually enjoying that book? Reading about chivalry and dramatic stuff and all that BS. Getting smarter…oooOOOOoooo. Sometimes I just want to rip his book-mark out and watch his reaction.
The Hybrid WSP who’s reading a novel is like the middle of a venn diagram. The left side is the WSP, the right side is the novel reader, and that space created by the crossover is this hybrid douche. This guy has pesos and can read well. Wow that makes him King Mufassa and everyone else a bunch of hyenas. Like he’s the supernova of the sky. Like when he goes to the bathroom and makes a deposit to the doodoo bank it don’t stink. Oh common…